Dear Diary,
Now that I’m on my second entry I feel really experienced with writing in my diary. Just like when I got really experienced at frenching when I french kissed my PM Dawn poster. I’m going to try to french kiss the cat on your cover now.
Ok. I just did it. I’m getting really good at it. I’m really sensual and even make the good noises. I can’t wait until I get to french Lance.
So, i started a new rumor today. Nancy Beans got an A in Spanish and I got a B-. I don’t think that’s fair. That’s why I whispered to Jason Cutlet that I heard that Nancy Beans was diddling her VJ in Mr. Maneuver’s spanish class. Everytime Mr. Maneuver would say: Casa or Hola she would strum her frontbutt like a 6 stringed banjo. The thought of strings made me think of another rumor that I couldn’t hold in so I also told him she keeps polly-O string cheese in her locker and eats it during her frees. That’s howcome she’s fat. Because she eats so many carbs from the cheese. Even though she’s really skinny. But whatever.
Cutlet told Mickey Rubberneck who started craning her neck as usual and now somebody has scotch taped string all over the Beans’ locker. I don’t want to be mean but as I said it’s really not fair that she got an A in spanish when I didn’t. Blue Robin took the strings down.
I also heard that Buck Tight Jimmy was trying out for the Special Olympics. That’s when I told everyone he was paralyzed. Margaret Swampscott told me that she saw him walking around just that morning. I told her that his legs are fake and he lost them in the war (that’s what happened to my grandpa). I didn’t tell anyone else because Buck Tight is friends with Lance.
Speaking of Lance, I can’t stop thinking about his coonskin cap. I heard he got it in Maryland (at least that’s what I told Jennifer Chicken) which is so hot that he’s a world traveler. I heard he went to Minnesota too. I can’t wait to get on the back of his bike and ride to some far off place like Tampa, Florida. I”m SO EXCITED!!!
That’s all for now.
Catch U L8TR.
Love,
donna
previously: Donna’s New Diary
previously: Donna McDonald’s Guide to Gossip
previously: Featured Bio – Donna McDonald
